Growth has to be Intentional

Gardening is therapeutic and full of lessons. Does that word "gardening" make you think of people kneeling on the earth, doing weeding? Or perhaps holding some electric shears and making shapes out of full bushes. Whatever your take on that word is, the same is true - there are lessons to be learned!

Take this pot of mint for instance. Together with a few other herbs, it was gifted by a friend, and came with instructions on the care needed. Needless to say, I have worked to ensure they are followed! Not being green fingered, I didn't want to report any deaths, so I was diligent. I even enlisted my husband in the care! As he is semi-retired, he ended up doing a much better job of making sure they thrive than I ever could. He is even able to cultivate and grow more shoots with the roots.

I am reminded Colossians 2:6,7 “As you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him, rooted and built and built up in Him, established in the faith, as you have been taught, abounding with thanksgiving”. 

One has to be intentional in growing. And passing on the information. I think they use the fancy word "mentoring" now. 

Purposefully Being Private

Restricted movement declared for two weeks. 

God speaks to us in all circumstances

Good Article - 5 Things People Blame the Church For … but Shouldn’t

Good article

5 Things People Blame the Church For … but Shouldn’t

There’s a lot of church bashing that happens these days. I get that. Some of it is deserved.

Like me, maybe you’ve noticed that a lot of people feel justified in dismissing the church as anything between a complete disappointment and otherwise useless.

Doubtless people have been hurt in the church and hurt by the church, and for that I feel terrible.

But it’s one thing to have a bad experience or a series of bad experiences. It’s another to hang on to them for far longer than you should, especially when you have a role in them that you refuse to see.

So in the hopes of clarifying a few things and helping us all move through whatever hang-ups might be lingering, here are five things people blame their church for … but shouldn’t.

1. The church didn’t stop you from growing spiritually.

Most church leaders have heard this before from someone who’s new at your church. I went to X church for two years but I just didn’t grow there. Now I’ve come here. Hopefully I’ll grow!

I’ve heard this so many times, at one point I believed the logic. Until I realized that we were this person’s fifth church in six years, and they didn’t grow at any of them. Which makes you ask the question … is it really the church, or could it be them?

I came to the realization years ago that I’m responsible for my spiritual growth. Nobody can make me grow. And honestly, no one can keep me from growing because no one can actually control my thoughts, my heart and my mind. I can offer them to God in free surrender whenever I want.

Understand, the church can help, but it’s not responsible for your spiritual growth. You are.

2. The church didn’t burn you out.

You meet a lot of people in ministry, both paid and volunteer, who will tell you the church burned them out. As someone who has burned out while leading a church, it would be tempting for me to say, “For sure … my church burned me out. You should see the demands people made on me as a pastor and leader!”

But I would never say that.

You know who burned me out?

I did. 

I am responsible for my burnout. I pushed too hard for too long. I didn’t deal with underlying issues. I burned myself out.

Now, granted, I think ministry can be confusing, and I think it’s easier to burn out in ministry than in other vocations (for the reasons why that is, read this post).

But I’m responsible. And so, honestly, are you. For more on burnout,start with this post.

3. The church didn’t make you cynical.

I’ve heard many Christians say, “I’m so cynical after working at/attending several churches.”

And for sure, any student of human nature can become cynical.

But the church didn’t make you cynical. You let your heart grow hard. You chose to believe certain things about people, about God, about life, and it built a crust around something that used to be alive and vibrant.

The biggest challenge in life is to see life for what it really is but keep your heart fully engaged. God loves to help people do that.

I fight cynicism daily. And if anyone makes me cynical, it’s me … not you, not God, not culture, not the church. I want my heart to be alive and celebrating each day. That’s a choice I make with God’s help.

4. The church didn’t cause your unforgiveness.

It’s easy to hold a grudge. Get hurt (and yes, I’ve been hurt by people in the church too) and hang onto it long enough, and grudges will form.

Soon you’ll not want to hear someone’s name, let alone run into them in the supermarket.

Too many people in the church or who walked away from the church carry unforgiveness and blame the church for it.

What are you hanging onto from a bad church experience that you need to let go of?

Forgiveness is the one of most Christian things people can do. Yet it’s what far too many Christians withhold from one another.

I love how Mark Twain phrased it: “Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.”

5. The church didn’t make you lose your faith.

I hesitate to write this one. I’m a church leader. I do everything I can to help people find faith in Jesus Christ.

I also realize I’m far from perfect, that our church is not perfect, and that there never will be perfection on this side of heaven.

It breaks my heart when I hear people say, “I went to church but it was so bad/so hypocritical/so shallow I lost my faith.” I realize we don’t always do a good job. In fact, sometimes churches do a terrible job. Sometimes I do a terrible job.

But as you’ve seen throughout this piece, nobody else makes you lose your faith. That was or is a choice you made. It is.

And it’s a choice I make every day. To believe when there are more than a few reasons not to. To love when people don’t love me back. To forgive when it’s easier to hang on to the hurt. To trust when there’s probably a few reasons to stop trusting.

So if you want to believe again … believe again.

A Challenge

Now let me give you a challenge. I realize many of you have been hurt by the church. I realize many of you have grown cynical. And that’s true of people who have left the church and who are in the church.

Here’s the challenge: Be part of the solution. And the solution is not to walk away or be endlessly critical.

The reason I lead a church is because I believe Jesus designed the church to be the hope of the world. Churches are imperfect organizations, but they’re also chosen organizations. We’re on a mission given by Christ. We’re his chosen instrument.

I just want to be part of the solution, not part of the problem. The world has enough cynics and critics.

We need people and we need leaders who deal hope.

Would you be one of them? Maybe get involved again? Or join a church and decide to work toward a better future? Or start a church of your own? That would be incredible. Really … it would! We need more optimists and more people ready to make the world a better place.

I’d love to hear what you’re taking responsibility for in your life and how you’ve decided to make a difference. 

By  Carey Nieuwhof

Catch 22?

How can you allow someone to do something when you suspect they might make mistakes along the way?

But if you don't allow them to try, making mistakes as they do, how will they learn?

Line upon line, precept upon precept, grace upon grace.

To Keep in Mind Always

To keep in mind always, yes, but more important, to act upon.
Obedience is not obedience unless it has been acted on correctly.

And, if I might add, with the right attitude.

Late

It's late.

But I need to say something here.

Worth falling alseep over the laptop.

What earth-shaking, ground-moving event am I talking about?

Simple.

Intentional Discipleship Training Phase 2 has begun....

Fellowship with the Saints

There is something about the gathering of the saints.
We love having guests round. This is my Hubby's men's IDT group and their families. (IDT = Intentional Discipleship Training, and yes, we ARE trained. Memory verses included!)

Strength through Intimacy.

"With God,

on a day-to-day basis,

the goal isn't to get there.

The goal is to be."

says John Paul Jackson in

Strength Through Intimacy

I agree. Don't you?

Shaking Hands to Memorize

We have begun Intentional Discipleship Training in the church I work for.

Part of the training requires us to memorize Scriptures - naturally.

I find that when we put a physical activity to something we want to remember (e.g. writing a reminder, typing a text, doing an action) helps to jolt the gray matter. It somehow increases the retaining power.

So we did that recently - we did actions to recite our memory verse with.
I couldn't resist taking photos instead of reciting to my partner!

Discipleship the Asian Way

We live in a fast-food, fast-everything age. Bosses who want things the day before set the pace in our work. Instant noodles encourage us to not to waste time with our meals. The microwave oven made huge inroads into cooking time. I am sure you can think of more examples.

But one thing that cant be rushed is discipleship.

In the West, courses are held, lecture style. At the end of submitted assignments, you get a qualification. Then we address people as Doctor so-and-so, with a theological degree. It seems like we honour more the people who get diplomas and degrees for being able to complete essays and theses. We seem to be seen as holy and more of a disciple of Jesus when we have letters of the alphabet before or after our name.

But I am not convinced that this is the Jesus way.

Yes He was called Rabbi. But that was because He taught and lived what He taught. He took His students with Him and they lived and breathed alongside Him. They learned real life, theology, and doctrine all rolled together.

You can call it mentoring or discipleship. More and more the Western world feels that this is the way to go. We have now institutions set up for that as well! I know, because I was signed up for one!

But at the end of the day, when the rubber hits the road, it all boils down to who we are behind closed doors.

With Jesus, He took His disciples with Him behind closed doors.

Do we dare to do likewise?

Ought we not do likewise?

Negative and Positive

We need to go back to 2 Corinthians or we will not finish! Hahahaha! Remember, there are many lessons from this jewel, but we are focusing mainly on what we can learn from Paul and his character. (I say "we" but you are basically reading what I have to say!)

I am struck by 2 Cor 4:2 in particular. "But we have renounced the hidden things of shame, not walking in craftiness nor handling the word of God deceitfully, but by manifestation of the truth commending ourselves to every man's conscience in the sight of God."

Paul mentions two negative behaviour - indulging in the hidden things of shame and walking in craftiness. When I read about the hidden things of shame, I am reminded of pornography, gluttony, ungodly relationships, idols in our lives, and whatever else you would want to hide. We hide them because we know that we are doing wrong! And yet, we do them. In so doing, we indulge in them whereas we ought to renounce them and walk away from them! Walking in craftiness is where we use our own man-made intelligence and wisdom. A crafty person usually uses his/her intelligence for selfish gain.

But what I really like about Paul here is that he doesn't just dwell on the negative. So often when we give advice, counsel people or even try to help, we tend focus on the negative. Parents will tell their children not to do things, to stop playing with something, or to cease a form of behaviour. What is often lacking is the positive alternative.

Paul here mentioned the positive alternative. He gives a suggestion, a solution. He allows the truth to show up and be scrutinized under that light. Then he also talks about being accountable to others in a public way.

This makes me glad that I will be entering into intentional discipleship making with two other people. I still dont know who they are yet - the church is assigning me! But in this group, we will encourage one another to continue in our relationship with the Lord, expressedly where the Word of God is concerned. This also means we become accountable to one another, and we pray for one another.

Can't wait for it to start!